How to Achieve an Amicable Divorce

We live in uncertain and challenging times. A recent survey concluded that over 25% of married couples confessed to feeling the pressure on their relationship. Lockdown may be the final straw that breaks a faltering marriage.

Divorce can be a collaborative and respectful process. Here are our top tips to achieve a good divorce:

• Acknowledge your emotions but do not be ruled by them. Divorce is like a bereavement and you may experience some or all of the grief cycle including denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This is normal. A supportive network or therapeutic assistance including counselling, will assist. Do not let emotions cloud your decision making and avoid oversharing on social media.
 
• Understand your legal rights and select a good family lawyer with whom you can work closely. Teamwork is essential. An open and honest approach working in a mutually respectful manner with your ex and his legal representative will ensure a clear focus and the best chance for a positive outcome.
 
• A primary concern will be how you stand financially. Essentially what are the assets? How may assets be shared? What will happen to the family home or the family business? The process of exchanging financial information, or disclosure, is key. Both parties have a duty to provide full and frank disclosure on an ongoing basis. Only when there is clarity regarding family finances can there be a sensible dialogue as to how such finances can be divided, taking into account your respective needs and the needs of your children. Negotiations based on an acceptance that there has been full and frank disclosure can lead to an agreement being reached. Once an agreement has been reached regarding financial matters, then following Decree Nisi within divorce proceedings, the financial agreement can be submitted to the court in the form of a Consent Application, to take effect following Decree Absolute
 
• Decree Absolute dissolves the marriage but financial claims do remain. Obtaining a financial order therefore, hopefully by consent, is essential. In most cases the parties will strive to achieve a Clean Break Order.
 
• Once the financial order has been made and the terms of the agreement implemented, and the Decree Absolute has dissolved the marriage, you may be forgiven for believing your divorce journey is at an end. Do not forget to review and update your Will. Review your Letter of Wishes, Death in Service and Nomination provisions. Put your financial house in order
 
• Divorce may dissolve your marriage, but as parents you will retain parental responsibility. Parents who work closely together provide a positive role model to their children as to how discourse and disagreement may be addressed. Keep working together in order to co-parent your children, show your children how to achieve a good divorce.

For more information please contact our Family Team.

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