New Year. New Start. Thinking about divorce? It pays to be prepared.

The new year often brings a period of reflection. For some, that reflection leads to difficult but important questions about the future of a relationship. If divorce is something you are considering, being prepared – emotionally, practically and legally – can make a significant difference to both the process and the outcome.

Understanding the divorce process early

An hour with an experienced family solicitor will pay dividends. A lot of information on the internet is misleading and/or plain wrong and what happened in your friend’s divorce may not apply in your case. A family lawyer will talk you through your rights and options and give you advice tailored to your circumstances.

A family lawyer will explain the divorce process clearly, outline your rights and responsibilities, and help you understand the options available to you. This early guidance often saves time, cost and stress later on by avoiding common pitfalls and misconceptions. The best way to find a good family lawyer is through recommendation (family, friends, your accountant or IFA may know someone). Alternatively, visit the Resolution website for more information about family law specialist advisors.

Getting your affairs in order

Preparation is not just about understanding the law; it is also about having a clear picture of your financial position. Gathering key documents early can make the process smoother. Organise all your financial documents such as P60, tax returns, bank statements etc. Send off for a valuation (Cash Equivalent Valuation or CEV) of all your pensions. Get a redemption statement on any mortgage or loan.

It is important to remember that while transparency is required in divorce, accessing your husband’s or wife’s (spouse) confidential documents without permission is not allowed and can cause serious difficulties. Each person will be required to provide full and frank disclosure in due course, so there is no need to go through your spouse’s documents.

At the same time, it can be helpful to think realistically about your future income and outgoings. Preparing a post-separation budget allows you to focus on what you need to move forward and provides a solid foundation for financial discussions

Protecting yourself practically

There are also practical steps worth considering early on, such as reviewing and managing or closing joint accounts, checking your credit position and taking advice before making any major changes – particularly when it comes to the family home.

Moving out of a property without advice, especially where the property is in your spouse’s sole name, can have unintended legal and financial consequences.

This is also an appropriate time to review your will and estate planning arrangements, which are often overlooked during separation but remain critically important.

Putting children first

For parents, the well-being of children is often the greatest concern. Thinking carefully about how and when to talk to your children about separation can help them feel secure and supported. Where possible, both parents having a calm and planned conversation together with the children can reduce everyone’s anxiety and confusion.

Children may benefit from additional support during this time, whether from school, family members or other trusted adults. Letting schools know about changes at home can also ensure that children receive understanding and appropriate support during the transition.

Resolving issues with minimal conflict

While divorce can be challenging, it does not have to be combative. Many issues can be resolved constructively with legal support, but it is also worth asking your solicitor about alternative methods such as family mediation, which can be highly effective where direct agreement is difficult. Mediation is often quicker, less expensive and less stressful than court proceedings, and can help preserve workable relationships for the future – particularly where children are involved.

Looking after your emotional wellbeing

Divorce is not just a legal process; it is an emotional one. Divorce can be draining. Seeking emotional support can be just as important as addressing the practicalities. This is where divorce coaches or counsellors may help. They can provide valuable space to process emotions and plan next steps. A solicitor can often suggest someone who might be suitable for you.

Looking ahead

While divorce can be painful, it can also mark the beginning of a new chapter and bring a sense of freedom and opportunity. Give yourself time to adjust. How do you want your life to be in the future? Where do you want to live? Do you want a change of career? What can you do now that you could not before?

Thinking about what you want your future to look like can help turn uncertainty into purpose.

Taking the time to prepare at an early stage allows you to approach divorce with greater confidence and focus, helping you to make decisions that support your long-term wellbeing.

For clear, constructive and compassionate advice, contact The Geldards Family Team, who are experienced in guiding clients through divorce with sensitivity and practical insight.